First of many appointments at Fetal Assessment.

We had to wait a week for our Fetal Assessment appointment at the Women’s Hospital in Winnipeg. I was anxious for the appointment. I was hoping and praying that perhaps the ultrasound had been wrong, or that God and healed my baby. But this was not the case. After meeting with the Geneticist about this deformity we were told that it wasn’t anything that Carl and I did, or that we carried a gene to cause the defect. We of course were offered to terminate the pregnancy, and try for another healthy baby. The chance of having another CDH baby was only 2%. Terminating, of course was not an option for me. (Termination of a pregnancy is another story and I choose not to discuss at this time.) I had the amazing support of my husband, and if there was even a 1% chance my baby would survive I had to give it that chance.

The Fetal Assessment Unit at the Women’s hospital is amazing. They are very busy, yet always professional, with a feeling of caring. Now the waiting room at the Women’s Hospital is another story all together. Now you have to understand that in the province of Manitoba where we have universal healthcare for all, all are treated as equal. So everyone and I mean everyone that has any risk in their pregnancy is sent to this unit. This includes every woman with possible complications affecting the baby. For example, gestational diabetes, over the age of 35 years, high blood pressure, and as in our case a question about development, it also includes mothers addicted to drugs and alcohol and the lifestyle that brings with them. So needless to say, sitting in the waiting room opens my very secluded world of small town living.

Our nurse stenographer was the best, her name was Marie. She let us see our baby in 3D for the first time. She explained everything to us. Dr. Mytopher was the first OB that I saw and it was her duty to explain to us that the hernia was severe and that many babies do survive, but there are many that don’t. After we expressed again that we would go forward with the pregnancy she stressed that it would be a long journey.

I asked for more information on CDH since the only real information that I had was from reading other blogs and finding medical journals on the internet. Marie was kind enough to photocopy a chapter out of a medical textbook. This information was very black and white and gave the mortality rate at about 50%. The Children’s Hospital in Winnipeg has about a 70 % survival rate for CDH babies. The problem is that there is no way for medical professionals to tell you where your baby will fall. We would continue to be seen at Fetal Assessment and they would monitor the growth of our baby. We were promised that they would be up front about anything they found. Marie also gave me her direct phone number at the unit and told me to call anytime I had any questions. She also told me that is was important that I stay positive, because right now, while my baby was still in utero, it was fine.

With this new information, Carl and I went home. My parents came over the talk about the appointment and just to be supportive. I confided in my mother that I felt defeated and had no desire to fight for this baby. We prayed together and she told me to not despair, to keep my chin up and gave me a bible verse. “Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength.” Isaiah 40:31 She reminded me that God had sent this baby to us.